My Own Hero
by Severus Addicted
Summary: Harry can't stand it anymore. I have never writen anything like this before so please be nice! Severitus with a twist, deffinately never done by me yet. Warning: Might need a box of tissues by your side, Suicide of the main character.
1. Chapter 1

**My Own Hero**

**A/N: This story is quite sad; I balled when I wrote it. I am warning you now you might need a box of tissues beside you!**

**Thank you, Severus Addicted**

Harry glared at the reflection in the mirror as he smashed his hand through the glass making shards of clear objects fly into his flesh. Blood flowed freely from his fists and different places where the glass hit him. But he didn't care, it felt good.

How could people put the fate of a world in a teenager's hands? Harry didn't understand how could they do that to someone. It was just too frustrating and it felt as if everyone relied on you but you couldn't rely on them. How would that make you feel?

Everyone Harry has ever relied on has either died or refused him. First it was his parents then his relatives but they never cared about him all they ever did was hurt him and tell him how useless he was, which was true in his eyes anyway. Then it was Albus but he always looked past his complaints of going back to his relative's house, he didn't understand what happened behind closed doors. How they beat him to unconsciousness every day, how he was told endlessly how worthless he was. How he should just die and get it over with, he was going to die anyway, everyone does. After that it was Sirius but he died and would never be coming to save him, Harry could be his only hero now to get himself out of this situation, no one else would do it. The Weasley's were the only ones that ever showed that they cared about him but Harry either didn't believe it or just couldn't trust those kind of emotions anymore. Remus and everyone from the Order would never understand truly what was the matter and why he always looked depressed when anyone mentioned his relatives.

No one would understand, because they apparently didn't care enough to look past the mask that hid his emotions. The fake smile that played on his lips when the time was needed it was always a forced smile, it pained him to lie to everyone about how he truly felt but if he did tell them would they listen? Or would they turn their backs on him like everyone else in this world has? Harry wasn't going to test it, he would probably fail anyway.

The only thing that ran through his mind twenty-four-seven was suicide. Suicide would be a quick and painless way to end this nightmare of his, but how to conquer the doubt that even when he dies he would be pained for eternally was hard to get over.

He would be leaving this world anyway tonight when the big hand of the clock hits the twelve. He would be leaving and never coming back. Never to be a burden to anyone again, never to disgrace the world with his freakishness, never again would Harry James Potter live to see another day.

Harry turn from his broken mirror and walked back to Dudley's second bedroom ignoring all the threats he heard from his aunt about what would happen when his uncle came home and saw what he did to their 'precious' mirror.

Obviously they cared more about their mirror then him. The mirror and him were a lot alike all the same though. The mirror is now smashed just like his soul, just like his humanity. But the only difference is that his relatives care what happened to the bloody mirror but could care less when they break him like that. They smashed his emotions to smithereens just like he smashed the glass. Just the same.

Harry slammed the door behind him and heard all his locks being locked. He was now locked in the room where he is constantly tortured, either by the hands of his uncle or by himself and his depression.

Harry sighed and sat down at his desk then withdrew what parchment he had left from the times his relatives left him write to Hermione and Ron. This would be the last time he wrote to them, they might not even get it but it was still the last time.

Harry went to grab some of the ink from under the floorboard but noticed it was all gone. Harry shrugged and grabbed the knife instead. His own blood would work to write his suicide note, its not like he will need all his blood later anyway.

Harry slowly slit his wrists then squeezed some blood onto a scrap of wallpaper he tore off not seconds ago. Harry continued to squeeze some of his blood onto the wallpaper scrap while loving the pain all the same.

After that was done with Harry picked up his quill and quickly began writing his suicide note. Harry was already beginning to feel dizzy from all the blood he lost.

_Dear Ron and Hermione and anyone else who would even dare to care about me, _

_I write you this letter as I am slowly dieing from my own hands. I can not hold this a secret anymore. I have been abused by my relatives since I could barely walk. I tried to tell Professor Dumbledore but he obviously couldn't see the truth that hid behind the doors of Number Four Private Drive. I cannot stand this anymore I am sorry but I can't. Everyone expects me to be some hero to save your world, but I can't be that person. I am not that person, I am just a worthless freak who should have died when Voldemort tried the first time, but I didn't so I lived on to be a burden on everyone's home and heart, but you won't have to worry about that anymore because I will no longer be there for that to happen. All my scars from my uncle have taught me just how much I deserve death, I deserve death more then death itself. I hope you understand why I cannot live on any longer. I cannot be strong anymore, I have tried but I have failed; just like everything else I have tried._

_Ron continue to look after Hermione she is a beautiful girl who needs to be protected. She needs to be protected from people like my uncle, from people like me; freaks._

_Hermione keep your head up you were always the smartest of us all and I am proud of you for that. I am sorry that I cannot be proud of myself for anything. Tonight will be the first time that I am actually proud of myself for something, I have finally paid my debt and now I can die._

_Albus, I forgive you. I deserved this anyway so it was a good thing you never believed me when I basically screamed for you to save me._

_Everyone else live on as if I never existed, it's the best. _

_Hero's will never exist, you must be your own hero and that is what I am doing today, I am being my own hero, I am saving myself._

_Sincerely, Harry James Potter_

With that done Harry said goodbye to Hedwig then picked up his knife and sliced down his arms. Harry lay down on his floor and left the blood flow from his arms bleeding him dry.

This is how they found Harry James Potter the next day when the wards fell.

Albus picked the letter up with tears in his eyes and read it aloud. Albus was devastated with himself. How could he not see how much pain his Golden Boy was in? Albus turned as he heard more people run into the room. It was Severus.

Severus fell down to Lily's only child and cried. He cried for how he always treated him openly but inside he loved him like his own son; his and Lily's son. Severus cried as he held him in his arms for what seemed like the first and the last time.

What was even more devastating was that Severus just got a letter from Lily telling him that Harry was truly his son. And now they won't ever have a family. Severus cried until he felt as if he could never cry again then he left someone levitate him back to the Hogwarts infirmary where he stayed until he could come to the conclusion that he wasn't coming back. His boy wasn't coming back…

A few weeks later they held a funeral for Harry, it was a private one which meant no one that didn't truly know Harry, the boy who always hid his emotions.

Severus in his best robes slowly walked down the steps to where the funeral was being held, which was right in front of the school at Harry's favorite spot; by the big rock in front of the pond. Severus looked around himself and saw all the Weasley family still with puffy eyes sitting to the right of the coffin. The Grangers were sitting right beside the Weasley family; Hermione burst into tears when she saw him walking towards the chairs.

Everyone knew that Severus was Harry's biological father, it was announced the day after the Wizarding World found out about the death of their Savior.

All the professors sat on the left side; Hegrid and Minerva were still in tears for their loss. A bunch of Harry's friends sat in the back looking pale and devastated.

Severus seated himself beside the Weasley and Granger family. They all gave him sympathetic looks and Molly gave him a hug and told him things will get better. Even Ronald gave him a sympathetic look.

All the tears and talking was silenced when Albus stood to begin the funeral.

"We have all lost a dear one to us. We had no idea how much pain he was in but now we can safely say he is happy and not in pain anymore.-" Severus drifted off to his own thoughts as Albus continued. He was in a daze even when everyone got up to put a pile of flowers on in front of Harry's grave. He waited until everyone was gone before he stood and slowly made his way to the small grave of his son.

Severus knelt down and chocked on a sob as he gently stroked the emerald flowers he was about to place on the freshly dug dirt. Severus finally left his tears fall as he read the tombstone the tomb read:

_ Harry James Snape_

_Born: July 31, 1980 Deceased: July 13, 1996_

_ A friend, a son, and a leader to us all_

_ May you finally rest in peace _

Severus stood after about five minutes of just tracing the letters of his son's tombstone then looked up to the sky and realized it was almost dark. Severus then started his trek up to Hogwarts for a restless night.

As Severus walked he could have sworn he heard the wind whisper in his ear, "I love you, dad."

**A/N: How do you like it? I warned you it would be sad!**

**Please tell me if it was good, that was my first fanfic like that and I am pretty proud of it. : )**

**Don't forget to review, that was in Harry's will too….. Jk but seriously please review!**

**Thank you for reading!**

**~Severus Addicted**


	2. this is important

**A/N: Sorry this isn't a real chapter but this is important.**

**If you ever hear someone mentioning about suicidal thoughts or threatening about killing themselves don't ignore it, act immediately. Trust me I know, my own cousin killed himself not too long ago and I feel as if it is my entire fault, I could have stopped it. But every time he ever mentioned anything related to suicide he would say he was just joking, but obviously he wasn't. **

**My cousin was my best friend and my hero, but just like my story says hero's don't exist you must be your own hero every now and then. My cousin was my role model he taught me how to ride my bike, and how to tie my shoes. He was always there for me when I needed him, he always had the best advice, and I just wish he would have used his own advice once in a while.**

**Suicide is nothing to joke about, it is important to keep your eyes and ears open for any sign of depression, because if there is depression most of the time there are suicidal thoughts. Please I beg of you don't joke around with suicide, its nothing funny, it's nothing to play around with. Suicide hurts your family and friends even if you think you are doing them well, to get rid of yourself, you're not.**

**I miss my cousin ever night since his death. We were so close, just like Oreo and milk. My aunt and uncle asked me to sing at his funeral a couple days ago (which is why I haven't updated my stories for a while, that and my grandmother fell.) Like I said life got in the way.**

**At his funeral I sang Slipped Away by Avril Lavigne. I just hope he heard me; he always loved singing with me. We would have little karaoke acts for our families and at the family reunions. **

**I just never knew what pain he was going through inside his heart, inside his soul.**

**Some of the signs to watch for you if you think someone you know is suicidal are:**

**A sudden change in behavior **

**Preoccupation with death**

**Giving away belongings**

**Direct or indirect threats to commit suicide.**

**Please this is nothing to joke around with.**

**If you see any of those signs of suicide please call:**

**800-SUICIDE: 800-784-2433**

**Or…**

**Yellow Ribbon Project: 303-429-3530, 3531, 3532**

**Youth Crisis Line: 800-843-5200**

**Thank you, Severus Addicted**

_Austin I miss you…_


End file.
